Brunette Moon

Sunday, November 29, 2009

I'll right I'll admit it I bought my New Moon tickets about a month ago. I'm really not that crazy I just wanted to be able to see the movie in a timely manner and since every other Twilight fan has been logging on and Fandangoing away all the good seats I had to step in and take matters into my own hands. I have read the books but in a non crazy Edward you can bite me and take my soul kind of way. Personally I think that Stephanie Meyers isn't a very good writer her excessive use of adjectives like rock hard and granite in reference to Edwards chest tends to be a bit annoying but as stories goes I think she tells a good one. And as movies go New Moon was pretty entertaining as well! I'm not going to go into details about the special effects or the differences between the book and the movie because frankly I really don't care that much. But the one thing I really did have a problem with was the supposed most beautiful man/vampire in world Robert Patterson's complete lack of muscle tone! If you don't believe me I will now show you visual proof.

For most of the movie your eye candy needs are suppress by this thoroughly lovely bronzed beauty


And then out of nowhere in all of it's high def glory this supposed 100 some odd year old mystical "granite chested" vampire god steps into frame with his nasty sallow sparkling grandpa skin and fake air brushed abs... Are you kidding me? How much are they paying this guy? When this image appeared on screen I wanted to scream out while writhing in pain form what my eyes had just beheld. BRING BACK THE WEREWOLF! ( I refrained) I'm sorry girls but your vampire hottie is a vampire nottie!

Now I bet your asking yourself this... Tigan how to do you know those abs are air brushed. Well because this is the back view...

and there is no way on earth a back view with slight muffin top and plumbers crack like that produces a front view like this!

Granite chest my foot.

Or maybe I'm just a little bias. Edward fans please no hate mail.


On a side note if your wondering why the pictures of Rob have little black dots all over his skin? It's so they know where to CGI him some sparkle. Oh and why the post title? After we experienced New Moon and I was feeling a little less vampire and a little more werewolf we thought Blake outta try out some time on the dark side. Namely as a brunette

I think it turned out pretty good!



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  1. I could not agree more about Stephenie Meyers writing style. The story line was pretty good but the writing detracted from it.

  2. I don't need to dye my hair, so eat that!

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  4. The "slight muffin top and plumbers crack" comment cracked me up! I totally agree with your observations regarding Twilight.


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